Because religion should not matter (too much)

New York

Baby Jesus gets GPS Implant

Simulated Baby Jesus Tracker

Stealing the baby Jesus from the mangers of nativity scenes has become a popular international pastime. Last January we reported on a number of Jesus snatching incidents from around the world. This year, the baby Jesus is fighting back. Brickhouse Security, a New York based company, is offering free GPS tracking to churches for the Christmas period. A motion-activated device is fitted inside the baby and sends a distress call. The position of the baby can then be tracked online. The device has A-GPS, so even if satellites are unavailable, the location can be tracked to the nearest base station. So far, over 60 churches in 25 states have enrolled in the Baby Jesus GPS program. The best quote came from a nativity caretaker, Alan Czyewski, who claimed that Jesus would approve of the implant and it would make it easier for his disciples to follow him.

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