News related to apathists
No, not Robert Plant. The new vicar, Tom Plant, at St Michael’s Church in Camden, has applied for an alcohol licence. He is planning to run gigs in the church 4 evenings a week, in order to earn much needed revenue to support their mission. He does not have a problem with alcohol and said “Jesus turned water into wine for a reason.” To help with one of the problems that alcohol consumption brings, three new portable loos have been installed on the grounds of the church. Flirting with alcohol is nothing new, on the second and fourth Tuesday of each month, they also run a Theology in the Pub session, where those of drinking age can talk about faith over a pint. Father Plant, who is a Nine Inch Nails fan, says they are not talking about heavy metal or a mosh pit and he has no plans to invite AC/DC or Metallica, but rather solo artists and poets. No, he won’t violate you. No, he won’t desecrate you. Well let’s hope not. We wish him well with his novel approach.
The Russian Orthodox Church has condemned the Eurovision winner, drag queen Conchita Wurst. This led to Rustem Adagamov, a prominent Russian blogger, tweeting “The ROC categorically opposes bearded men in dresses!” along with a picture of their priests in full ceremonial robes. I just thought, I’d help it go viral. Thanks Bill.
You can’t get to a church right now? Well we have answered your prayers. Our Church of Apathy App is a virtual church for your iPhone, iPad, or Android smartphone. From naming ceremonies for your baby to funerals for departed friends, the Church of Apathy App has a full range of services for those times when you can’t make it to a real church (or don’t want to).
The Church of Apathy app is ideal for those times when you can’t attend a ceremony in a real church. If you don’t want to spend a dollar on the full App, download the free version and confess your sins or see what you are missing on YouTube.
- Naming Ceremony – Name your children and welcome them into the church.
- Confession – Don’t bear the guilt longer than necessary. Find a quiet spot and make that confession straight away.
- Service – Can’t make it to church for a mass or service? Attend a short service at the Church of Apathy instead.
- Partnership – Want to take your relationship to the next level, but are not quite ready for the whole legal aspect? We have the answer.
- Funeral – You can’t make it to the real funeral? No problem. Hold your own remembrance with our funeral service.
The search has been called off for Benito Flores, aged 43, who was swept out to sea during a baptism on a Guadalupe beach in California on Sunday. He was helping his cousin Pastor Maurigro Cervantes, of the Jesus Christ Light of the Sky church, who performs two or three such ceremonies each year. About 25 people were attending the ceremony and witnessed a big wave knock the pastor, Benito and the person being baptised off their feet. Two of them managed to save themselves, but Benito was caught by another wave and swept out to sea. He has not been seen since.
With a little bit of 3D Modelling, jiggery pokery, HTML5 and divine intervention, we have managed to upgrade our website yet again. We have also tried to use our new look graphics across all our web presences, so you know you are dealing with the same Church of Apathy, whether you are on our website, Facebook or whatever.
The old m.churchofapathy.org site will no longer be updated.
At the end of the World Youth Day week of celebration, the Pope’s Mass had to be moved to the beach of Copacabana due to weather changing the original location into a mud field. The shoreline most famous for night clubs and partying was swamped by over 3 million people enthusiastically greeting the pope and offering up babies to be kissed.
In his sermon Pope Francis encouraged young people who have protested against corruption to continue their efforts, fight apathy and offer a christian response. Many young people in Brazil have taken this as support for peaceful change, not a crusade. I agree that there cannot be apathy to corruption, but as for religion, that is a different matter.
Meanwhile, back in Rome, the media are being anything but apathetic towards Pope Francis and have been busy digging up dirt. The Italian clergyman hand-picked by Pope Francis to be papal delegate for the Vatican Bank, Battista Ricca, had a damning story published in the Italian press just days before the pope left for Brazil. The article charged that while Battista served in Uruguay from 1999 to 2001, he had a live-in male lover, cruised gay bars and brought a young man back to the Vatican embassy and ended up trapped in an elevator with him overnight. So far, Battista has retained his position. Additionally journalists have discovered that a woman Pope Francis appointed to a commission to study reform in the Vatican, Francesca Immacolata Chaouqui, while having excellent credentials, has issued some Tweets critical of the church. And just to round it off, the media published a letter allegedly written by Nunzio Scarano, the former Vatican accountant, arrested for his part in a plot to smuggle $26 million in cash, to Pope Francis protesting his innocence. He claims to have documents to show Pope Francis secretly, which will prove that he only acted under the direction of his superiors.
So I guess Pope Francis will not be going home for a rest. There’s a lot going on.
It seems a lot of atheists would like to go to a Sunday service, but most are put off by the believing in God aspect. Now, in North London at least, there is a monthly Sunday service for non-believers, loosely following the format of Christian services. The Sunday Assembly, as it is called, was started by comedians Pippa Evans and Sanderson Jones. They have readings, sermons about caring for others, silent reflection, sing songs like “Don’t stop me now – Queen” and of course take up a collection. It’s everything you would expect from a religion, apart from the faith in God bit. For the second meeting, the service attracted too many people and some had to be directed to a nearby bar to watch a video feed of the event. It turns out that religion can be fun if you omit the faith in god. Watch the video on BBC at http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-21325805
The Sunday Assembly website (sundayassembly.com) has a link to help you if you want to set it up in your area. I think it’s a great idea, but I’m too much of an Apathist to do anything about it. however, if you start it up in my area, I’ll drop in from time to time.
Yesterday the pope released a dove as a sign of peace following the angelus on holocaust day. A watching seagull, perhaps a nazi sympathiser intending to protest, attacked the dove and tried to kill it. Thousands of onlookers in St. Peter’s square looked on, as the dove flew for its life, trying to escape the gull. After a short while their prayers were answered as the dove flew free. Last year when the pope released two doves from the same window, they flew back in through the open window. Perhaps they had been given a tip off about another planned gull attack.
Jesus has made it into the top 25 most popular passwords for the first time. More and more foolish people are trusting the security of their data to the password Jesus. In their annual “25 Worst Passwords of the Year”, SplashData reveal that Jesus has entered the chart at number 21. The password “password” has topped the list again, followed by “123456” and “12345678”, while “1234567” has dropped 6 places down to 13.
Please ensure that if you choose a password, you don’t pick one from the list, your name or birthday, your football team, or in fact any word in a dictionary. Add some numbers (no not password with a zero) and peculiar symbols. Then you can pray to your God or Gods for extra protection, if you think that will help.
Here is the full list of the 25 most popular passwords for your pleasure:
- password (unchanged)
- 123456 (unchanged)
- 12345678 (unchanged
- abc123 (up 1)
- qwerty (down 1)
- monkey (unchanged)
- letmein (up 1)
- dragon (up 2)
- 111111 (up 3)
- baseball (up 1)
- iloveyou (up 2)
- trustno1 (down 3)
- 1234567 (down 6)
- sunshine (up 1)
- master (down 1)
- 123123 (up 4)
- welcome (new)
- shadow (up 1)
- ashley (down 3)
- football (up 5)
- Jesus (new)
- michael (up 2)
- ninja (new)
- mustang (new)
- password1 (new)
In a study, researchers in Australia have confirmed a link between BMI and religious denomination. In a survey of nearly 10,000 people they found that Catholic and Baptist men have a higher BMI than non-religious men and Christian women have a higher BMI than others. In their paper “Religion and BMI in Australia”, Kortt and Dollery note that many religious occasions involve food as part of the celebration, thus condoning over-eating. We need more researchers to continue this important work in other locations. I have a feeling that the influence of religion on BMI is leading to needless health problems throughout the world. Images of Jesus keep popping up on foodstuffs. What does it all mean?